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Belonging and Owning (pt. 1)

It’s amazing sometimes, how much insight can be housed in a child’s naïve, innocent little mind. During a slightly more interesting than normal morning commute, I posed a question to our kids: “Why do you belong to mommy and daddy?” Beta, our little boy, responded immediately, and very sincerely by saying, “Because I love you both very much.” Aside from melting my heart, his response touched the core of what I love about the concept of marriage for myself.

Anillos de Matrimonio, Aros de Matrimonio

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Thoughts on Facial Hair and Self-Acceptance

hair removal - Chinatown; Bangkok, city of angels

hair removal – Chinatown; Bangkok, city of angels (Photo credit: Sailing “Footprints: Real to Reel” (Ronn ashore))

I have been thining a alot lately about what being a woman means to me. I have also been thinking even more about raising a daughter. I want Rho and I to help our children develop self-awarness and a very strong sense of self-acceptance and self-worth.

I can’t help but wonder about the ideas society feeds into the minds of young people, especially young girls. I am working on another post and I hope to wrap it up soon, but in the meantime I’ve  been thinking about some reading I’ve been doing. I read this Daily Mail article and then this post by Curvaceous Dee. But what started it all off was this  article on xoJane.com. After reading that, what I really wanted to do is share a comment I made on xoJane.

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Work (A Poem)

I wrote a poem! It’s something that I’ve been known to do from time to time, but I don’t do it nearly as often as I used to. Anyway… Please enjoy!

Also, I would love some feedback. So stop by the comments and let me know what you think!

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This Polyamorist’s Creed

Assassin's Creed 3 Boston

Nothing is true; everything is permitted

Altaïr, Ezio, Ratonhnhaké:ton, and Desmond all lived by a Creed.

I don’t consider myself an assassin, but today I experienced an eruption of thoughts that have been circulating in my mind for quite some time and for reasons deeper than this post will explore. But, in addition to this article, that eruption (“compulsive, uncontrollable word-vomit”, I called it on twitter earlier today) produced a personal Creed that resonates with that of the fictional Assassin’s:

“Nothing is real; everything is experienced. “

What does that even mean?

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The Barrier

Silk Handkerchiefs Cravates Pocket Squares IMG...

Typical Barrier

This has probably happened to most of us at least once… you’re really hungry, but you can’t think of anything you actually want to eat that doesn’t require more energy and effort than you have. But, then you remember that you’re really close to this restaurant. You don’t eat there very often at all, but every time you do, you leave saying that you need to eat more there more often because the food is surprisingly good.

Sex, and especially sex between two long time partners,  can be a lot like that sometimes. With work, school, kids, and just the rest of life in general,sometimes finding the compatible levels of horniness AND time AND energy can be a challenge. But, think about that feeling when you remember the restaurant…Think about that; that’s what mutual masturbation is to our sex life. So when Êta suggested the other night, with both of us quite tired and low on the energy front, that we head off to bed a little early for a bit of dual wanking, I eagerly and wholeheartedly agreed without hesitation.

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No Place Like Home

I love marriage. Not necessarily the ‘official’ kind of marriage that requires a piece of paper from a judge or the blessing of a religious official, if that’s your thing. (It was a judge for us… but that’s a wholly different story.) Not the marriage that’s a construct of society, religion, the state, or anyone. I mean marriage that’s almost the living, breathing construct of no one but the participants.  Marriage in the sense of being bound to another by the deepest part of self. The kind of marriage that you feel within you. I’ve always felt that. That sense of comfort in the knowing that something is just…right. Like clicking the heels of your sparkling red shoes.

Dorothy's Ruby Slippers

There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home.

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The Gift of Choice, Family, and Love

Celebrate You- Celebrate Life!

Celebrate You- Celebrate Life! (Photo credit: sirwiseowl)

When he was working on our post On  Holidays and Untraditions, Rho had a snippet of writing that he didn’t want to get rid of, so he started this post in case we wanted to make a Christmas post. When I opened it up today. I saw what he wrote. It struck me hard because the conversation I had at work was weighing on me. Here is what Rho had written:

“…and NEVER let this stranger know you have kids, because then you’re an asshole as a bonus! …Because you’re ‘denying the kids all the joy'”.

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Tweeting Together Weekly

Birds of a feather tweet together… We are back! After a bit of an unexpected break, we have a few of the things from our feed that caught our attention over the last few weeks that you may have missed. Click through for the list!

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Don’t Judge Our Poly

gavel

We are Poly..

We are a male /female couple and we are currently looking for another woman to share our life with. I guess we are called unicorn hunters.  This term has taken on a negative view for some people. However I really think that it is unfair to be judged so harshly. Why can’t people make choices about how they want to live, who they want to love and how they chose to label or not label themselves?

I know this seems like a rant and I guess it may be, but really more than anything it is a form of reflection and explanation.

We are not currently looking for a male or a male/female couple to spend our life with. Why? Because, even though I consider myself bi-sexual I currently have no desire to be with another man. I know that at any time I can talk to my husband about any desires that I may or may not have to be with another man or men for that matter. My lack of current desire does not mean that I am not poly. This does not mean that I think my way is the right way and that someone else’s is wrong. Point of the matter is I do not think there is a right way or a wrong way to “be poly”. What fits for one family may not fit for the next.

Please don’t judge our  Poly.

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On Holidays and Untraditions…

Thanksgiving at the Trolls

Yesterday was Thanksgiving in the US. So, it’s not unexpected to see that much attention is given to the holiday from meals, to parades to football. It’s has also been interesting to see how recurrent this Huffington Post article about sharing the holidays as a poly family has been. Looking Through.Us tweeted about an article that was at least a bit of an exception in that it acknowledged that there may be differences. Even this article, though, assumes that there is some holiday tradition. But what happens when there is none at all?
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